Gayleen the house sharing queen & baby regret boringers pt 7

Coline's vlog today...

Didn't mind it, actually kinda enjoyed the part where she talks about her fave things. For once, she's not pretending to be this fart/period/poop/mange obsessed clown who never showers, and explains her skincare regimen, shows her $200 oribe shampoo, new purses, and shoes.

She's being the basic bitch she truly is...and at least she's not trying to be this fake, obnoxious caricature of herself...fronting like she hates things she actually loves.

Embrace your true self, Coline...drink that kombucha, gurl!

Jul 22, 2017 10:18:05 GMT 10 Burntheukelele said:

Coline's vlog today...

Didn't mind it, actually kinda enjoyed the part where she talks about her fave things. For once, she's not pretending to be this fart/period/poop/mange obsessed clown who never showers, and explains her skincare regimen, shows her $200 oribe shampoo, new purses, and shoes.

 Not sure if you are being sarcastic... But she literally shows all the skin care and shampoo and everything and then says something along the lines of  "But I never shower. This is rare. I shower like once a week." She is still desperately trying to cling to the fact that she doesn't bathe. 

I feel like Colleen has the potential to make interesting main channel videos, but a lot of it feels very recycled/unoriginal to me. Maybe it's also the fact that her target audience is preteens.......

I want to know where the Coach outlet is in Vancouver. It's not in that new outlet mall out at Tsawassen. Also that shampoo retails for $150 for a 1L bottle. Wow.

For real though when are the Ballinger family vlogs stopping? Surely no kid aged over 12 would want vlog cameras on them all day every day - even if they don't explicitly say, you'd think the parents would be savvy enough to know. How would Chris feel if Gwen and Tim vlogged his childhood and forced him to perform? I hope they actually ask the kids if they want to be on camera each time they pull it out, but its pretty clear its just shoved in their faces. They are the worst. Also oatmeal in a cup, made with your hotel coffee maker? These kids MAKE YOU YOUR MONEY - the least C + J could do is provide them with a balanced meal?! Maybe the crab budget is bigger than we thought?

Especially when they've been swimming. My kids are ravenous after!
Also I wouldn't use the hotel coffee pot, much less feed my kids from it. Those things are filthy. 🤢

A bunch of people have suggested that Colleen seems be kind of over HBO at this point. I used to think her show getting cancelled would absolutely destroy her but the more I think about it the more I think it might be a blessing in disguise. As much as Colleen talks about how much she loves her show and how it's a dream come true I think it's too much for her.
I think she's more in love with the idea of having her own show than the reality of it. I'm not saying she's lazy or she doesn't have a strong worth ethic, but she's used to being her own boss and doing her own thing and for the first time in a long time she had to answer to other people and keep someone else's schedule and be away from home, all of which seem to make her miserable. On top of that she tried to do way too much. She could have easily hired more experienced writers and producers and taken a back seat but she needed to be in control and have her hand in everything and her show suffered as a result.
On top of the show she chose to keep touring and churning out content constantly. She just bit off more than she could chew and it shows. Her content is subpar and her health and wellbeing is declining. She doesn't sleep enough, I don't think she has a full blown eating disorder but being busy/stressed seems to make her lose her appeitite or forget to eat. I think HBO getting canned would be a huge relief for her.
If that does happen I hope she takes a break, like a real break, not making a tearful video saying she needs some time to herself then reappearing two days later like "EVERYTHING IS AWESOME!!!". She needs to actually go to therapy, take it seriously and put in the work for her depression, self-esteem and body issues. She needs to focus on improving relationships/friendship and making new friends. instead of finding people to collab with. She needs to surround herself with people whose company she enjoys and who actually make her happy instead of people who she thinks can help her or who think she can help them. She needs to actually live her life and make the kind of content that makes HER happy and that SHE wants to make instead of copying other peoples' ideas and rehashing her old ideas.
Take a proper break, don't add more shows or try to plan as many collabs as humanly possible. Your fans will still be there for you when you come back and if they're not they probably weren't that great of fans anyways.
Sorry for the long post, that was my last shred of compassion and now I'll go back to being a bitter old husk.

Jul 22, 2017 10:52:07 GMT 10 anastasia said:

I want to know where the Coach outlet is in Vancouver. It's not in that new outlet mall out at Tsawassen. Also that shampoo retails for $150 for a 1L bottle. Wow.

Maybe the Richmond outlet mall by the airport? I'd be verrrrrry surprised if Colleen ventured out to Tsawwassen, that and I wouldn't want her to complain about how janky my hometown is

Jul 22, 2017 11:17:28 GMT 10 beamishly said:

Jul 22, 2017 10:52:07 GMT 10 anastasia said:

I want to know where the Coach outlet is in Vancouver. It's not in that new outlet mall out at Tsawassen. Also that shampoo retails for $150 for a 1L bottle. Wow.

Maybe the Richmond outlet mall by the airport? I'd be verrrrrry surprised if Colleen ventured out to Tsawwassen, that and I wouldn't want her to complain about how janky my hometown is

Yeah it must be the one at Richmond. I'm annoyed because I was literally there on Monday. Not by the airport but in Richmond, hit IKEA but I would have popped in to check it out. How did I not know about that? We don't get over to the mainland much but still!

Jul 22, 2017 10:52:07 GMT 10 anastasia said:

I want to know where the Coach outlet is in Vancouver. It's not in that new outlet mall out at Tsawassen. Also that shampoo retails for $150 for a 1L bottle. Wow.

I'm feeling like all this,"I've never had a nice designer thing..." is all bullshit and all for the benefit of being #relatable to her 12 year old audience. She claims like she shops at Target and makes it look like she only ever shops there so that she doesn't isolate her audience.

But I think she shops at designer shops all the time and is just careful not to show it on her videos - we all know she has the capacity to do this. #cabingate

IIRC, Kory got her a designer backpack for Christmas, I think. I don't think Kory would splurge on her like that if she might not like it, at all. I think she only said it was from an outlet, again, to still make it relatable.

Doubt she didn't have to pay for the shampoo and skincare things, as well. Especially that huge bottle. If she got it for free, it would probably just be a 300ml bottle.

"I'M JUST LIKE YOU, YOU GUYS. I'M SO RELATABLE!! *burp* YOU GUYS ARE MY BEST FRIENDS AND I SHOP AT TARGET AND BUY CHEAP CRAP LIKE YOU GUYS, TOO! *fart*"

ETA: she also always says she knows nothing of ___________. But then it's at least acceptable, what she does. Like, I remember her once saying that she doesn't know how to cook, but she has cooked a lot of her and Josh's salmon and veggie thing and she is ALWAYS helping out in Gwen's kitchen when there is something going on. Plus she bakes a lot.

Or this fashion thing, says she doesn't know anything about it, yet is all about the high waisted jeans and crop tops that were on trend. It goes on and on. And it is all to be, again, relatable to her young audience. These kids will grow up thinking it's okay not to be good at these things because they look up to someone who isn't. But Colleen is saying this because the kids might not be as good at these things because they can still be young. It's a whole cycle. A very bad cycle.

Jul 22, 2017 11:34:59 GMT 10 nzt48 said:

Jul 22, 2017 10:52:07 GMT 10 anastasia said:

I want to know where the Coach outlet is in Vancouver. It's not in that new outlet mall out at Tsawassen. Also that shampoo retails for $150 for a 1L bottle. Wow.

I'm feeling like all this,"I've never had a nice designer thing..." is all bullshit and all for the benefit of being #relatable to her 12 year old audience. She claims like she shops in Target and makes it look like she only ever shops there so that she doesn't isolate her audience.

But I think she shops at designer shops all the time and is just careful not to show it on her videos - we all know she has the capacity to do this. #cabingate

IIRC, Kory got her a designer backpack for Christmas, I think. I don't think Kory would splurge on her like that if she might not like it, at all. I think she only said it was from an outlet, again, to still make it relatable.

Doubt she didn't have to pay for the shampoo and skincare things, as well. Especially that huge bottle. If she got it for free, it would probably just be a 300ml bottle.

"I'M JUST LIKE YOU, YOU GUYS. I'M SO RELATABLE!! *burp* YOU GUYS ARE MY BEST FRIENDS AND I SHOP AT TARGET AND BUY CHEAP CRAP LIKE YOU GUYS, TOO! *fart*"

I can actually see her being like that. She does seem to dress in mostly cheaply made stuff, not designer.

I know people who make decent money and refuse to pay for a haircut.

I can see the show paying for the shampoo and skin care stuff. The stylists probably got some for her so that they didn't have to touch her dirty hair and skin.

Jul 22, 2017 11:29:31 GMT 10 anastasia said:

Jul 22, 2017 11:17:28 GMT 10 beamishly said:

Maybe the Richmond outlet mall by the airport? I'd be verrrrrry surprised if Colleen ventured out to Tsawwassen, that and I wouldn't want her to complain about how janky my hometown is

Yeah it must be the one at Richmond. I'm annoyed because I was literally there on Monday. Not by the airport but in Richmond, hit IKEA but I would have popped in to check it out. How did I not know about that? We don't get over to the mainland much but still!

Totally off topic but you were at Richmond IKEA on Monday??? Me too! Small world!

Jul 22, 2017 11:48:18 GMT 10 @barnicole85 said:

Jul 22, 2017 11:29:31 GMT 10 anastasia said:

Yeah it must be the one at Richmond. I'm annoyed because I was literally there on Monday. Not by the airport but in Richmond, hit IKEA but I would have popped in to check it out. How did I not know about that? We don't get over to the mainland much but still!

Totally off topic but you were at Richmond IKEA on Monday??? Me too! Small world!

Lol yeah I was! That's hilarious!

Jul 22, 2017 6:19:21 GMT 10 sammierae said:

She's getting thinner and thinner. I'm hoping she's lying and she does work out and eat a normal diet and that's why she's lost weight. She says it's her metabolism but for the majority of her life she was just a normal slender girl. She needs to be careful and watch herself mentally because anorexia can sneak up on you from controlled to crazy in a blink of an eye. As much as I don't like Colleen,I don't want to see her end up like Eugenia Cooney.

Maybe, BUT shes no where near as thin as she was last year at this time.

Jul 22, 2017 6:27:27 GMT 10 nzt48 said:

Jul 21, 2017 13:06:27 GMT 10 ihateukuleles said:

Colleen's latest crying vlog.

What I see is someone having this amazing AMAZING BLAH BLAH time in her life with no one to share it with.

Chris bailed to be a stage dad. Rachel moved out and hasn't been to Canada. Her friends and parents didn't visit Canada like last year. Kory has a new friend. Erik is in LA.... hopefully reconciling with his pretty ex girlfriend. Her numbers are slipping. People *us* are on to her. Haters Back Off is probably stinking up the place and she knows the critics and fans are going to hate it. And, worst of all, she tossed aside like trash her #1 fan, Josh, who is slowly but surely coming out of his Colleen nightmare and living his life, and looking delish, by the way.

You know how you can look at a baby and tell he or she is tired? I look at Colleen and see someone all alone. And, that's what she deserves.

Funny how this worked out IRL because, ***spoilers***, this is how S1 of HBO ends. She's all alone, with no one to feed her gargantuan ego.

Super ironic!

Jul 22, 2017 11:34:59 GMT 10 nzt48 said:

Jul 22, 2017 10:52:07 GMT 10 anastasia said:

I want to know where the Coach outlet is in Vancouver. It's not in that new outlet mall out at Tsawassen. Also that shampoo retails for $150 for a 1L bottle. Wow.

I'm feeling like all this,"I've never had a nice designer thing..." is all bullshit and all for the benefit of being #relatable to her 12 year old audience. She claims like she shops at Target and makes it look like she only ever shops there so that she doesn't isolate her audience.

But I think she shops at designer shops all the time and is just careful not to show it on her videos - we all know she has the capacity to do this. #cabingate

IIRC, Kory got her a designer backpack for Christmas, I think. I don't think Kory would splurge on her like that if she might not like it, at all. I think she only said it was from an outlet, again, to still make it relatable.

Doubt she didn't have to pay for the shampoo and skincare things, as well. Especially that huge bottle. If she got it for free, it would probably just be a 300ml bottle.

"I'M JUST LIKE YOU, YOU GUYS. I'M SO RELATABLE!! *burp* YOU GUYS ARE MY BEST FRIENDS AND I SHOP AT TARGET AND BUY CHEAP CRAP LIKE YOU GUYS, TOO! *fart*"

ETA: she also always says she knows nothing of ___________. But then it's at least acceptable, what she does. Like, I remember her once saying that she doesn't know how to cook, but she has cooked a lot of her and Josh's salmon and veggie thing and she is ALWAYS helping out in Gwen's kitchen when there is something going on. Plus she bakes a lot.

Or this fashion thing, says she doesn't know anything about it, yet is all about the high waisted jeans and crop tops that were on trend. It goes on and on. And it is all to be, again, relatable to her young audience. These kids will grow up thinking it's okay not to be good at these things because they look up to someone who isn't. But Colleen is saying this because the kids might not be as good at these things because they can still be young. It's a whole cycle. A very bad cycle.

That's what I was thinking too!  Kory got her that black backpack....and i think it was coach brand too...🤔🤥

I have two very random thoughts/half-memories...

I feel like I recall Colleen once saying that Jessica is the funniest person she knows. I remember at the time thinking "Really? Jessica? She's never once made me laugh..."

And I see what you guys see, where it seems like there's some type of cold shoulder thing going on with Jessica and the rest of the family. So I find it especially hard to believe that Colleen thinks she's so funny.

I also have a vague memory of Colleen saying in her deleted video connected with cabingate that it was a romantic getaway that she was third wheeling on. Which is why when Eric was discovered to be there with them it seemed to say, yes, they are definitely a couple.

I'm also realizing that if this was the case and Colleen was truly crying and so lonely because Eric went to go snowboarding for a few hours with Rachel and Matt, that that is the most pathetic, dramatic, over-bearing, clingy thing for her to do in a new relationship. I can just imagine her sitting there, texting him and not getting any replies, then trying to go onto the internet and not getting a good signal, then realizing that nobody cares about her being alone cause they're having fun (unlike her because god forbid she just get on the bunny hill for a few hours and try something new) and just full on having a fit over it. And I can totally see this being true because we have plenty of evidence of her being a big baby who needs a man to run to her aide any time she feels a little lonely or scared or worried or stressed whether it be Josh, Kory, her dad or some new fling. This bitch is cray.

Jul 22, 2017 7:11:13 GMT 10 trubbled said:

Some other things that bother me about her period vid are

1. How can you confuse menses with poop?
2. Why did she look so horrified when she smelled it and it wasn't poop? Surely, it didn't smell worse than poop.
3. Do most mothers not prepare their daughters for this? Why did it take so long to figure out her period started?
4. This was not realistic at all. I know she had to make a whole video about it, but it could have been done better. It wasn't funny or clever.

Just catching up but... I whole heartedly agree with this post. The whole "did I poop my pants" thing.. wtf?!? I'm concerned for you, toeleen. That's not normal, gurrrrllllllll....

I understand she thinks she is a "comedian", but ffs, the majority of your fan base is of the age where they are probably going through this and instead of being realistic and informative you act like an idiot. 🙄

Jul 22, 2017 13:49:19 GMT 10 AK713 said:

Jul 22, 2017 7:11:13 GMT 10 trubbled said:

Some other things that bother me about her period vid are

1. How can you confuse menses with poop?
2. Why did she look so horrified when she smelled it and it wasn't poop? Surely, it didn't smell worse than poop.
3. Do most mothers not prepare their daughters for this? Why did it take so long to figure out her period started?
4. This was not realistic at all. I know she had to make a whole video about it, but it could have been done better. It wasn't funny or clever.

Just catching up but... I whole heartedly agree with this post. The whole "did I poop my pants" thing.. wtf?!? I'm concerned for you, toeleen. That's not normal, gurrrrllllllll....

I understand she thinks she is a "comedian", but ffs, the majority of your fan base is of the age where they are probably going through this and instead of being realistic and informative you act like an idiot. 🙄

To be fair, when I first got my period I thought I was peeing my pants or something and then when I saw the stain I thought I had shit myself lol but I was also 12 and was expecting bright red blood, not brownish stuff and I didn't know what it would feel like either. I mean I only thought those things for like a second before realizing nope this is just my first period, but still...
Then again, I haven't watched the video so maybe she's being more literal about it idk. I don't want to watch any more fucking period talks from Colleen tbh.

Jul 22, 2017 7:10:40 GMT 10 ihateukuleles said:

Latest dumbass Ballinger video;

~Jessa the Hut is MIA again. Hmmmmmm. Dunkey was there in the carriage for a second. Jess was 'napping."

~ Chris knows they are going to Disney. Writes some stupid chart a few days ago...but FORGETS THEIR YEARLY PASSES TO DISNEY. The kids had to settle for some mock up of a future Star Wars ride. (I'd rather stay at the hotel pool.) Bailey and Parker are over. it. 

~Chris FORGETS to charge his Go Pro, so they had to actually do an activity, swim, without being recorded by Cecille B. DeForgetFace

~Okay. Calm me down. These kids are up at the crack ass of dawn to be dragged to some dream convention for Chris. They swim. So, instead of going to a fun, delicious restaurant at Downtown Disney, they are doing HOTEL DINNER. Meaning, per Chris, they are just pulling together leftovers from camping that they had left in their room. The kids are snarfing down oatmeal. Now, I love oatmeal, and the first thing that I take into any hotel room are snacks...but, TAKE THESE KIDS OUT TO DINNER YOU IDIOT MORONS. FEED YOUR KIDS.

I really should make myself wait 30 minutes to post after watching a vlog. Sorry not sorry for yelling. These people are the worst.

#WhereIsJessica
#HotelDinnersAreSnacksNOTDinner
#ginkobilobaForMemoryLoss

Ihateukes, this post made me cry with laughter. And I am living for how triggered you are by Cecile b. Deforgetface. 😂😂 😂

My bf's parents took us to a seafood buffet and I ate a ton of crab and obviously thought about Jessica the whole time 😬

The period video is Colleen trying to be Liza. I even noticed she didn't do her normal eyeshadow and made her eyelashes really curly, just like Liza's.

And, from what Colleen has said, both things could be true... she started her period and she probably DID poop her pants too.

Jul 22, 2017 13:57:13 GMT 10 AK713 said:

Jul 22, 2017 7:10:40 GMT 10 ihateukuleles said:

Latest dumbass Ballinger video;

~Jessa the Hut is MIA again. Hmmmmmm. Dunkey was there in the carriage for a second. Jess was 'napping."

~ Chris knows they are going to Disney. Writes some stupid chart a few days ago...but FORGETS THEIR YEARLY PASSES TO DISNEY. The kids had to settle for some mock up of a future Star Wars ride. (I'd rather stay at the hotel pool.) Bailey and Parker are over. it. 

~Chris FORGETS to charge his Go Pro, so they had to actually do an activity, swim, without being recorded by Cecille B. DeForgetFace

~Okay. Calm me down. These kids are up at the crack ass of dawn to be dragged to some dream convention for Chris. They swim. So, instead of going to a fun, delicious restaurant at Downtown Disney, they are doing HOTEL DINNER. Meaning, per Chris, they are just pulling together leftovers from camping that they had left in their room. The kids are snarfing down oatmeal. Now, I love oatmeal, and the first thing that I take into any hotel room are snacks...but, TAKE THESE KIDS OUT TO DINNER YOU IDIOT MORONS. FEED YOUR KIDS.

I really should make myself wait 30 minutes to post after watching a vlog. Sorry not sorry for yelling. These people are the worst.

#WhereIsJessica
#HotelDinnersAreSnacksNOTDinner
#ginkobilobaForMemoryLoss

Ihateukes, this post made me cry with laughter. And I am living for how triggered you are by Cecile b. Deforgetface. 😂😂 😂

Hehehe!!!!!! Thank you. I really do think I have a problem!!! I never thought I would need anxiety meds just to watch the Ballinger Family. Haha.

Jul 22, 2017 13:54:17 GMT 10 srslypsychosoprano said:

Jul 22, 2017 13:49:19 GMT 10 AK713 said:

Just catching up but... I whole heartedly agree with this post. The whole "did I poop my pants" thing.. wtf?!? I'm concerned for you, toeleen. That's not normal, gurrrrllllllll....

I understand she thinks she is a "comedian", but ffs, the majority of your fan base is of the age where they are probably going through this and instead of being realistic and informative you act like an idiot. 🙄

To be fair, when I first got my period I thought I was peeing my pants or something and then when I saw the stain I thought I had shit myself lol but I was also 12 and was expecting bright red blood, not brownish stuff and I didn't know what it would feel like either. I mean I only thought those things for like a second before realizing nope this is just my first period, but still...
Then again, I haven't watched the video so maybe she's being more literal about it idk. I don't want to watch any more fucking period talks from Colleen tbh.

I totally get that, I def thought I was peeing myself and I agree it's not as you would expect, even with having some kind of warning/preparation for it... but I just feel like it didn't take much for me to realize what was going on. She made it seem like (IMO) it was some freaking unsolved mystery.


Also- I can't help but imagine how awkward all of these posts are for ackack if he's reading 😂😂

Jul 22, 2017 13:57:45 GMT 10 beamishly said:

My bf's parents took us to a seafood buffet and I ate a ton of crab and obviously thought about Jessica the whole time 😬

Did you wear that stupid crab hat like an adult baby trying to appeal to teens?

Jul 22, 2017 14:20:26 GMT 10 Tuskvegas said:

Jul 22, 2017 13:57:45 GMT 10 beamishly said:

My bf's parents took us to a seafood buffet and I ate a ton of crab and obviously thought about Jessica the whole time 😬

Did you wear that stupid crab hat like an adult baby trying to appeal to teens?

Truth be told I almost wore a lobster t-shirt

Ok so I just caught up on the ballinger vlog and oh my god. Maybe it's just because I'm drunk right now but I FINALLY have had it with them. They literally have to film EVERYTHING. And if the camera dies it sounds like it ruins his day. But it's like just SO damn annoying. Nothing is sacred to them. Also your kids eating oatmea from a coffee pot in a hotel on the floor, come on, there is no way you don't look like a bad parent. -sorry if I don't make sense y'all~ I tried

^^^^to be real nolitflat I live for your drunk post Becuase you DO in fact make sense
(no this isn't sarcasm either)

m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=10153723153265881&id=108351465880

I just remembered this storytime video that she took down from her channel, yet she kept this sneak peek on her Facebook page for some reason. Did anyone else get to watch the full video before it was deleted? I didn't see the point of her uploading it in the first place, tbh. It was just her lowkey bragging about how--in the beginning of her career--she met some really nice Hollywood producer who promised her a job, then he randomly calls her late in the middle of the night to come over for a threesome and says "show me your tits". She tried to act offended by it in the video, but you could tell she was loving the attention. I wonder why she took it down so fast. I think she either realized how conceited it made her sound, it made Josh uncomfortable  (this was before the divorce), or she was lying again. Damn it, I wish it was still up! We could've had a field day with that one, lol.

Jul 22, 2017 14:45:28 GMT 10 leeleelurker said:

m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=10153723153265881&id=108351465880

I just remembered this storytime video that she took down from her channel, yet she kept this sneak peek on her Facebook page for some reason. Did anyone else get to watch the full video before it was deleted? I didn't see the point of her uploading it in the first place, tbh. It was just her lowkey bragging about how--in the beginning of her career--she met some really nice Hollywood producer who promised her a job, then he randomly calls her late in the middle of the night to come over for a threesome and says "show me your tits". She tried to act offended by it in the video, but you could tell she was loving the attention. I wonder why she took it down so fast. I think she either realized how conceited it made her sound, it made Josh uncomfortable  (this was before the divorce), or she was lying again. Damn it, I wish it was still up! We could've had a field day with that one, lol.

I think she may have told this story more than once? It sounds super familiar (and I'm not one to typically immediately watch videos, so...) I'm not sure where'd I'd start to look for it though.


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