Ballinger boob edition:vinegar tits, boobs&clickbaiting Pt 5

Jun 28, 2017 17:29:05 GMT 10 @natalie said:

Colleen and her fake glasses piss me the fuck off. Oh I'm you've found a fashion accessory when I have to depend on them for you know, SEEING. I'm so glad that you think glasses are cool enough to go with your skanky outfit and make you look like a geek, but at least you can take them off when it's raining or how about when we can't wear 3D glasses over the top because it's uncomfortable as fuck, or when you and your partner both wear glasses and whenever you go to kiss you just CLASH RIGHT INTO EACH OTHERS GLASSES

ITS REALLY ANNOYING BUT AT LEAST YOU THINK YOU LOOK GOOD COLLEEN

THISSSS! I've never understood why it's acceptable to literally mimic what is technically a disability when it's glasses but if you pretended to have say hearing aids it's completely unacceptable?

Jun 28, 2017 17:34:10 GMT 10 Tuskvegas said:

Jun 28, 2017 17:30:32 GMT 10 @natalie said:

Moths are fuckin gross and are like dusty AF. I hate them and their flappy wings

dusty mother fuckers!

but i totally agree. As someone who is stuck wearing glasses (i got contacts stuck in my eye once and noped out of it forever), it kinda annoys me that she wears it as this "look at me, i'm so quirky" vibe.

Glasses you don't need (even plain clear ones) are unhealthy for your vision, according to my eye doctor. It's an idiotic "hipster" fashion statement smh.

I've noticed Coal and Josh both picked up several of each other's habits. Such as doing fake/unnatural faces (Colleen open-mouthed pose and Josh eyes wide-open pose), wearing the hipster glasses, and wearing those weird emo-colored lumberjack shirts.

@natalie imnotbothered Or how about when we cant even DRIVE without them? If Colleen's glasses fall off on a ride at Dollywood, she can still fucking get home. If my glasses break somewhere I'm fucking stranded! Plus I always have fears that my contacts will dry up/ get wrinkled or something on the road. Our drivers licenses are restricted FFS, and Colleen thinks it's something hilarious to mimic/mock??

Why are there "hard-of-hearing" people, but not hard-of-seeing people?! Cause that's what we are…

Jun 28, 2017 17:37:16 GMT 10 ihateukuleles said:

Just watched her latest vlog and heard her song(s)? First of all, I can't carry a tune in a bucket, but WHY does she always sing sooooo high???

That last song...she is such a bitch. That is such a ploy to get her sunfreaks to give her sympathy and to make Josh the bad guy. There isn't a doubt in my mind he said she didn't deserve his love...but probably after he found out she was cheating.

Also,the "leave me alone" part of the song is troubling. Josh, if you are still chasing her, PLEASE STOP. STOP. You will NEVER catch her. And, you are feeding her massive, unhealthy ego. And, you are humiliating yourself. She is set to crash and burn. Let her. She left you...and took all her problems with her. They didn't go away. She will do to Erik or Antony or Kory or Wicket what she did to you.

In the meantime, she is a cold hearted bitch. What happened to "Josh didn't do anything wrong. I still love him. Don't be mean to him." She is setting up her defense when the truth comes out.

she's Soprano which means high singing is her range BUT she mainly sings in her head voice which isn't actually good for you and you can damage your voice, it's okay some times but if you do it all the time it's damaging because you're not using your diaphragm to sing which helps with control and not damaging your voice box (sorry Musical Theatre student here) 😂

What's worrying about Colleen is she could come out and say josh was violent he was abusive and everyone would believe her. So she could be singing this song even tho it's nothing to do with josh but it's planting the seed that josh isn't all he's cracked up to be. Very clever and very manipulative.


I want to add that domestic abuse and violence is very serious and I'm not saying I wouldn't believe Colleen because it's never ok to victim shame however I just meant she could literally say anything about him and everyone would believe her it's quite terrifying

The glasses thing bugs me too.

I think Rachel told her how stupid it was. Rachel said, you wouldn't wear a fake hearing aid as an accessory.Colleen told that story wearing those stupid glasses.

She worries her hair is getting shorter and looks bad, then she uses the hot iron/straightener on it. Duh.

Chris is almost giddy to be away from his weird ass family. Why can't they use an editor in California? I wonder if Colleen would even do a season 3 (God help us) if they asked...because it is "so hard" to have your ass kissed in Canada vs. California.

I semi feel bad about being so mean, but then, I tell myself, they show their lives to get a reaction. Some people LOVELOVELOVELOVELOVELOVELOVELOVE her. We just happen to be irritated by her and them. Oops.

It isn't OUR fault that we know so much, are curious, and our natural reaction is what it is. That is THEIR fault.

Jun 28, 2017 17:30:32 GMT 10 @natalie said:

Jun 28, 2017 17:24:36 GMT 10 april_franco said:

But they are just fluffy butterflies.

Moths are fuckin gross and are like dusty AF. I hate them and their flappy wings

Jun 28, 2017 17:39:47 GMT 10 nosygossiplover said:

Jun 28, 2017 17:34:10 GMT 10 Tuskvegas said:

dusty mother fuckers!

but i totally agree. As someone who is stuck wearing glasses (i got contacts stuck in my eye once and noped out of it forever), it kinda annoys me that she wears it as this "look at me, i'm so quirky" vibe.

Glasses you don't need (even plain clear ones) are unhealthy for your vision, according to my eye doctor. It's an idiotic "hipster" fashion statement smh.

I've noticed Coal and Josh both picked up several of each other's habits. Such as doing fake/unnatural faces (Colleen open-mouthed pose and Josh eyes wide-open pose), wearing the hipster glasses, and wearing those weird emo-colored lumberjack shirts.

@natalie imnotbothered Or how about when we cant even DRIVE without them? If Colleen's glasses fall off on a ride at Dollywood, she can still fucking get home. If my glasses break somewhere I'm fucking stranded! Plus I always have fears that my contacts will dry up/ get wrinkled or something on the road. Our drivers licenses are restricted FFS, and Colleen thinks it's something hilarious to mimic/mock??

Why are there "hard-of-hearing" people, but not hard-of-seeing people?! Cause that's what we are…

exactly! Like my vision isn't so bad that I need them all the time to actually see, I can see without them but just not far away or read signs or anything but if I don't wear them for more than like 4/5 hours I end up with splitting headaches

Thanks for explaining, Imnot. Did you ever see this video? It is the only song of Colleen's that I halfway thought was good. (No earbuds.)

Jun 28, 2017 17:52:15 GMT 10 ihateukuleles said:

Thanks for explaining, Idon't. Did you ever see this video? It is the only song of Colleen's that I halfway thought was good. (No earbuds.)

her voice is okay here but I CANT DEAL WITH THOSE STUPID FUCKING FACES!

Jun 28, 2017 17:42:58 GMT 10 @natalie said:

What's worrying about Colleen is she could come out and say josh was violent he was abusive and everyone would believe her. So she could be singing this song even tho it's nothing to do with josh but it's planting the seed that josh isn't all he's cracked up to be. Very clever and very manipulative.


I want to add that domestic abuse and violence is very serious and I'm not saying I wouldn't believe Colleen because it's never ok to victim shame however I just meant she could literally say anything about him and everyone would believe her it's quite terrifying

So true. I know people often advise those going through a divorce to carry a voice recorder during every interactionjust in case the other person tries to trump up charges.  I am a HUGE DV advocate, but sadly,some do use the most shameful tactics to win in a break-up.  "Win." Knowing Colleen exaggerates and lies pretty easily, that IS scary.

I think she is manipulative too.  She is singing songs TO Josh...once again making her business for the world to know.

Maybe Erik dumped her and she is singing to him.  That would be sweet.   

*her voice is okay here but I CANT DEAL WITH THOSE STUPID FUCKING FACES!*

Hehehehehehehe.

(Oops, I fixed the profile name mistake.)

It's definitely something plausible, she's clearly attempted to disparage him in the past and has severely damaged his career more than once. I don't know that she'd do anything unless he called her out. But lets not forget she didn't lift a finger when people implied he was abusive towards her in the past.

Jun 28, 2017 13:40:17 GMT 10 trubbled said:

Watching today's blog she said "I'm grateful they let me in the editing room." She isn't doing any editing and there is no reason for her to be there! She can go home if she wants to, but she needs stuff to complain about so she stays up there being miserable!

Her singing still sounds sucky and those lyrics are sucky.

What does she mean "let" her in the editing room? I thought she was the chief writer/producer/editor extraordinaire. Lol

Jun 28, 2017 18:19:43 GMT 10 nosygossiplover said:

Jun 28, 2017 13:40:17 GMT 10 trubbled said:

Watching today's blog she said "I'm grateful they let me in the editing room." She isn't doing any editing and there is no reason for her to be there! She can go home if she wants to, but she needs stuff to complain about so she stays up there being miserable!

Her singing still sounds sucky and those lyrics are sucky.

What does she mean "let" her in the editing room? I thought she was the chief writer/producer/editor extraordinaire. Lol

not being able to stick to a lie is a strong ballinger trait

Jun 28, 2017 11:54:15 GMT 10 anastasia said:

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Barf. Also Jessica "They're conveniently gone. This is the third or fourth time that they're conveniently gone."
Maybe they're just sick of saying no to your entitled ass and listening to you whine about how you should be verified.

I didn't watch the video. Did she seriously walk up and ask the Instagram booth at vidcon to verify her? Hahahaha hahahaha

And why are those freaks so obsessed with trying to make Duncan smile? Is it some sort of secret illuminati entrance test getting a baby to smile on video? Remember when they endlessly jabbed his mouth with a table cloth trying to force a smile. Wtf???

ETA I saw the video now. Jessica states "I'm SO pro-breastfeeding in public!" Well then why do you suffocate your baby under shirts and massive blankets every time you nurse it?

They are weirdos.

I think they want him to smile AT VIDCON so they tell people like us how much Dublin (haha) LOVED VidCon despite the ear piercing noises, the billions of germs, the never ending boobage in his mouth and shirts he was stuffed into.

HE SMILED! Poor Dunkie is learning early that to be a Ballinger kid, you have to be a trained circus monkey.

When Jessica is imitating Duncan at the beginning of the last vlog Wanted to punch her so hard, she's just got a really punchable face

Jun 28, 2017 19:14:30 GMT 10 ihateukuleles said:

They are weirdos.

I think they want him to smile AT VIDCON so they tell people like us how much Dublin (haha) LOVED VidCon despite the ear piercing noises, the billions of germs, the never ending boobage in his mouth and shirts he was stuffed into.

HE SMILED! Poor Dunkie is learning early that to be a Ballinger kid, you have to be a trained circus monkey.

Exactly, they treat their kids like zoo animals. So sad

Can I just say most babies look like they're smiling when they have wind so 💁🏻

Jun 28, 2017 19:18:17 GMT 10 imnotbothered said:

Can I just say most babies look like they're smiling when they have wind so 💁🏻

Gasleen must have been smiling non-stop.

Wait did Colleen Ballinger / Miranda Sings sing I Will Always Love You while wheeling across the stage in a coffin! Horribly disrespectful. She's so classless, distasteful, and disgusting. I mean we knew that but this is a new low.

Just watched her vlog where she sings and plays the uke (with a pained expression!). The songs she's written are quite telling. The last one obviously suggests that she was the hurt party. I'm sure it's there to elicit some sympathy from her brainless fans, but I think it's pretty obvious that she wanted Josh to love her on her own terms and he said no. In her mind he rejected her, not the other way around. And I'm convinced she's believes this.

But the Lazy Sunday song is a love song. It's guaranteed she's written that due to a new relationship. She mentions feeling like she's 16 again like when you're in a new relationship when love is exciting. Also she mentions being held by that person but then there's a mysterious cut in the video. I bet there was some juicy lyrics that she preferred not to reveal. Probably something like

Lazy Sunday with you holding me,
Lazy Sunday, Erik, with you pounding me.....
Lazy Sunday, while I queef in bed,
Lazy Sunday, where I give you *ahem*

Jun 28, 2017 20:24:56 GMT 10 lurkylurk said:

Just watched her vlog where she sings and plays the uke (with a pained expression!). The songs she's written are quite telling. The last one obviously suggests that she was the hurt party. I'm sure it's there to elicit some sympathy from her brainless fans, but I think it's pretty obvious that she wanted Josh to love her on her own terms and he said no. In her mind he rejected her, not the other way around. And I'm convinced she's believes this.

But the Lazy Sunday song is a love song. It's guaranteed she's written that due to a new relationship. She mentions feeling like she's 16 again like when you're in a new relationship when love is exciting. Also she mentions being held by that person but then there's a mysterious cut in the video. I bet there was some juicy lyrics that she preferred not to reveal. Probably something like

Lazy Sunday with you holding me,
Lazy Sunday, Erik, with you pounding me.....
Lazy Sunday, while I queef in bed,
Lazy Sunday, where I give you *ahem*

Those lyrics are some of the most beautiful, heartrending words I've ever read, lurkylurk (sob, sob). You need to copyright them straight away.

But seriously, that would have to be the most disjointed,  badly edited, crap vlog I've ever seen. Absolute shit.

Jun 28, 2017 20:42:54 GMT 10 yograndma said:

Jun 28, 2017 20:24:56 GMT 10 lurkylurk said:

Those lyrics are some of the most beautiful, heartrending words I've ever read, lurkylurk (sob, sob). You need to copyright them straight away. 

But seriously, that would have to be the most disjointed,  badly edited, crap vlog I've ever seen. Absolute shit.

Why thank you. The music flows through me! All those lyrics need is some tinny ukulele as background accompaniment and a constipated look on your face while singing them!

I'll be honest I skipped through the vlog, but it seems the vlog did this at normal playback speed too! I've said it before she literally gives zero shits about the quality of her content. I'm at a loss as to why she's at all popular. And the comments, my God the comments, about her "angelic" voice? I've farted better rendition of songs.

Jun 28, 2017 20:24:56 GMT 10 lurkylurk said:

Lazy Sunday with you holding me,
Lazy Sunday, Erik, with you pounding me.....
Lazy Sunday, while I queef in bed,
Lazy Sunday, where I give you *ahem*

oh my god

Jun 28, 2017 17:52:15 GMT 10 ihateukuleles said:

Thanks for explaining, Imnot. Did you ever see this video? It is the only song of Colleen's that I halfway thought was good. (No earbuds.)

Ugh.. She ruined a perfectly good radiohead song.

Seriously..is it just me or does her voice sound actually good at certain parts, but then really kind of bad at others? Is it like she's singing mostly in one key or am Im just being bitchy cause i dislike her?

For the record (no pun intended), I can't carry a tune in a bucket.. I like to sing, but know I sound like an off-key howler monkey in pain..and Im cool with that..lol I love going to karaoke..and I figure as long as no one's ears bleed or head explodes, I don't care that im a horrid singer.

She sings high pitched because she desperately wants to sound like the woman from the weepies.

Well in a language you can understand, Coal:,*tongue pop* GURL. You ain't no weepies, mmkahhhhhy??

Since now apparently its fair game to have human emotions through lyrics, I hope josh let's the hell loose and comes hard with some scathing lyrics back at her.

And that lazy Sunday song... What a twist to the knife already in your ex husbands back. ALL he wanted was lazy days with you. ALL he asked of you was for one effing lazy day, and you couldn't even give him that on your anniversary. So now you're writing about your lazy Sundays with your new grease ball of a man? And isn't last Sunday after vidcon when she abruptly ended the vlog and everyone assumed she was still with Erik?

What a massive cunt.

I think she sounds okay when she sings quietly but when she gets shouty she just sounds nasally and, well, shouty. A bit like one of the Muppets, maybe Fozzie Bear. Sorry Fozzie; I don't mean to but I keep insulting Muppets characters and likening her to them. I think she's wrecked her voice with the shit Miranda singing because she sounds fairly average nowadays.

Jun 28, 2017 21:32:27 GMT 10 yograndma said:

I think she sounds okay when she sings quietly but when she gets shouty she just sounds nasally and, well, shouty. A bit like one of the Muppets, maybe Fozzie Bear. Sorry Fozzie; I don't mean to but I keep insulting Muppets characters and likening her to them. I think she's wrecked her voice with the shit Miranda singing because she sounds fairly average nowadays.

The problem is she doesn't sing like a singer should. I doubt shes trained in years and shouts lyrics and sings out of her comfort zone